Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(217): View more from Illinois

just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?

Fav 20 6361 1048
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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.

Fav 47 5070 1934
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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.

Fav 17 987 5202
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(978): View more from Massachusetts

Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles

Fav 8 2678 1435
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(716): View more from New York

she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper

Fav 28 6149 1697
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(405): View more from Oklahoma

He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.

Fav 4 3026 844
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(425): View more from Washington

Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?

Fav 13 748 1642
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(503): View more from Oregon

I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.

Fav 1 80 21
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(571): View more from Virginia

i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it

Fav 0 20 34
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