Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
