I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Randomize
