Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
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