Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize