I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're making bets on your personal life
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
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