Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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