I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
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