i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize
