im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
31 Times Kim Kardashian Showed Her Love For Balmain
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
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How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.