She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
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