I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Randomize
