The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
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