did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
