just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize
