i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Randomize
