what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Randomize
