out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
Are we still banned from the library?
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
