I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
Randomize
