Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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