if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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