i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize