I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I didn't shave. On purpose
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
Randomize
