life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
