tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Randomize
