wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
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