her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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