google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize