just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Randomize
