How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
I will be naked everywhere
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Randomize
