I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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