i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
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