I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Randomize
