i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
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