He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
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