It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Randomize
