I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Randomize
