Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Randomize
