I'm drive I can fine osifer
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize
