i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Randomize
