"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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