How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
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