was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Randomize
