I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Buhtt sex?
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
