brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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