Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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