Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
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