And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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