Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Randomize
