So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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