VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
how do flat chested girls get laid?
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
Randomize
