I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
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